Etiquette Quick Cards 📋
8 pocket guides for Chinese social situations. Tap any card to flip it and see the do's, don'ts, and key phrase.
Each card has a front (the situation) and a back (exactly what to do, not do, and say). Click or tap to flip.
Meeting a Chinese person for the first time
- Offer your business card with BOTH hands
- Receive cards with both hands and look at it before putting it away
- Use their surname + title (e.g. 王总 Wáng zǒng)
- Use their first name straight away
- Write on or stuff their card in your pocket
- Initiate a handshake too firmly — wait to follow their lead
Eating at a Chinese host's table
- Wait for the host to invite everyone to eat first
- Accept food placed in your bowl by a senior — eat it
- Compliment the food enthusiastically
- Stand chopsticks upright in rice (funeral symbol)
- Flip the whole fish (bad luck symbol)
- Finish every dish — leave some to show generosity
When toasts happen at a Chinese dinner
- Hold glass with BOTH hands when receiving a toast
- Lower your glass rim slightly below the senior's
- Explain early if you can't drink — offer a tea toast
- Hold your glass higher than a senior's
- Refuse without explanation
- Put your glass down before the toast is complete
Presenting a gift to a Chinese person
- Present with BOTH hands
- Wrap in red, gold, or festive colours
- Say "just a small token" — downplay it
- Give: clock, shoes, umbrella, pear
- Expect it to be opened in front of you
- Wrap in white or black
Being invited to a Chinese person's home
- Bring a small gift — fruit, pastries, or tea
- Remove shoes at the door (follow their lead)
- Compliment the home warmly
- Arrive empty-handed
- Wander into rooms without being invited
- Refuse food or tea when offered
Communicating with Chinese contacts on WeChat
- Use their title when texting superiors (e.g. 王总)
- Reply promptly — silence reads as ignoring
- Context-set when adding someone new
- Send very long voice messages (over 60 seconds)
- Message a senior after 10pm about work
- Reply only "OK" — add a line of substance
When someone gives you a hongbao
- Accept with both hands and say thank you
- Protest once or twice ("You really didn't have to!")
- Open it privately, not in front of the giver
- Refuse a red packet from an elder — it's disrespectful
- Open it immediately in front of the giver
- Comment on the amount out loud
When you need to apologise to a Chinese person
- Apologise sincerely and early — don't delay
- Acknowledge specifically what you did wrong
- Offer to make it right with an action, not just words
- Make excuses or defend yourself in the same breath
- Apologise over text for something serious — call or meet
- Let someone lose face in public — always apologise privately
📄 Download all 8 cards as printable PDF
Credit-card sized, wallet-ready. Print them and keep one in your pocket before your next China meeting.
Get VIP Access — $9.99 / 30 daysWhy These 8 Situations?
These 8 scenarios cover the moments foreigners most commonly get wrong in Chinese social settings. They are not obscure edge cases — they happen in virtually every meaningful interaction with Chinese people.
The underlying principle across all of them: face (面子, miànzi). Chinese social behaviour is largely organised around preserving everyone's dignity in public. Actions that cause someone to lose face — embarrass them, undermine them, or ignore their status — are the most serious social errors.
The simplest rule: when in doubt, show respect. Over-deferring is forgivable. Under-deferring is not.